INTEGRITY TO SAY NO

I had a disturbing dream last night about being captured by Chinese Communists, along with Ellen and about 100 others. We were all being marched to a re-education camp, from which we had no real hope of ever leaving alive. I talked with the guard, a businesslike lady, who explained how I needed to learn the benefits of socialism. I parrotted back to her my understanding of how it worked. If she makes $10,000 a year and I make $500,000, then I voluntarily give up my money, and we share our collective income. She said that was good, and to be expected.

As she walked away, I wondered what the last little phrase meant. Yet, I knew. Somehow my impression was that I said what every cowardly prisoner might say when first being interrogated; a feigned agreement with his captors, trying to give the impression of having common ground with them. More interrogation, and probably torture, would come, and she was not taken by my congeniality at all.

As I awoke, I reflected on what this meant. I saw it clearly: there are times when I pretend to agree with someone because it is easier than arguing. I did that recently with my sister and stepmother when my dad was having a procedure done. It is easier not to pray around them than to risk the awkward seriousness of traditional Christian behavior. But I felt that I had sold out in going along with light and temporal topics.

This is a matter of integrity for me. I want to be a man of his word, in season and out of season. Friday was a day out of season, and yet I was called to preach the word. But I failed.

"LORD, thank You for offering forgiveness and mercy in Christ Jesus. But let me be bold and consistent in my witness. I never want to give an answer that contradicts my life in You, simply because it will cause awkwardness in others. I confess to You my weakness in being a people pleaser. Make me strong, in the name of Jesus. Amen."
-ker